Saturday, June 24, 2006

On reaching the limit and kitties

As you all know, I've been on this exercize routine of mine almost ever since I started this blog. Lately, I've been skipping days, but on the whole, I'm still on track. I think so far, my only big disappointment is that I seem to have reached my limit in terms of how much I can handle. Hard as I've been pushing, there's just no budging that limit. I'm trying to figure out why I can't push this limit forward. When I used to do ballet, I handled a lot more physical exercize than what I'm currently doing, and I still managed to have the normal amount of energy like everyone else. Let's just forget that I'd fall asleep in class for a sec.

I suppose this has me thinking as to what might happen if I reach my limits elsewhere in life. Like, what if one day I find the limit of my acting talent, and fail to expand from there? Right now, it's not a problem, because I've been able to interpret quite a variety of different roles, and I've been able to reach out into all extremes of emotional portrayal. I've yet to find my limit. Someday though, I might find that limit. What'll I do then? Will I simply accept it and realize that I am human, and therefore I have my limits? Or will I be as stubborn as I always am and continue trying to push the unmoveable barrier that seems to be there?

I think though that the reason humans can continue to create and to live and to amaze and astound is the fact that we're always searching for our limits. We might not find them for a long time, or we might already know how far we can go. But, while that limit is there, it serves as a measuring stick for us. It serves as a way to reach out and touch and see if we're there or not, and how many times have we actually pushed ourselves to our limit. Some of the most awe-inspiring things on this earth are things that were created when people were searching for their limits.

In a way though, those who never find their limit, and who continuosly (sp?) push and push...they're the lucky ones, and they're the truly talented ones. If you don't know where your limit is, or how long it'll take to reach it, you can spend so much time creating and thinking and feeling without that obstacle, and as you keep on creating and thinking and feeling, what comes out will always be better than the last. Those who've found their limits, it's not to say that they become completely stagnant and unfeeling. But some of those who find their limits tend to dig themselves into a rut that's nearly impossible to climb out of. Others, though, are much more capable of accepting their limits and they continue to create awe-inspiring things within their limits.

Am I scared of finding my limits? To be honest, not at all. What I am scared of is never being able to keep on reaching out to find my limit, and to remain continuosly stagnant in life and in everything I do. So long as I continue to reach out and feel my way around, that's when I'll be happiest, not stagnant or simply watching things pass by me. This is probably why I'm still stubbornly pushing myself in my exercize routine. I know I can do this, I know I can do this...



Um, Robin? Kittens? What?

3 comments:

Sergio said...

Bueno, bueno... Yo difiero en una cosa. Dices en el post que aquellos que nunca encuentran sus limites son los talentosos, mientras que pienso que estos son los que se caen de frente y fracasan. En el momento que conoces tus limites, sabes lo que puedes, y lo que no puedes hacer. Therefore, en el momento que terminas la busqueda de tus limites, puedes comenzar una nueva misión: perfeccionar aquellas habilidades que tienes.
Si sabes que no puedes correr más, de (esto es un disparate) 50 millas por hora, entonces, puedes enfocarte, no en correr más rápido, sino en llegar más lejos con estas 50 millas. Te contentraras en como respirar mejor mientras corres, como mantener tu cuerpo relajado, etc. etc. etc.
Un actor que no conoce sus limites, puede darse un encontronazo en el momento que acepta un role, pensando que lo puede hacer, y una vez está atado a este, se da cuenta que hay una pared. Que no puede penetrar en el personaje por que éste está mucho más allá de sus habilidades.

Descubrir nuestros limites es la primera etapa de la vida. Para eso es la niñez, la adolescencia, la juventud en general. En el momento que ya trazas tu perimetro puedes comenzar a crear, tal vez no una mansión gigante, sino una mansión completamente simetrica, y indestructible.

Sergio

~Blue Angel*~ said...

nice title.
And can't anyone fix me?

Di said...

sergio- Profound. I actually thought on that. Thanks for your comment.

blue angel: If I find anyone, I'll refer you to them. =)