Wednesday, May 30, 2007

On freedom of speech

I would like to direct your attention for a moment elsewhere on the blogosphere.

Currently, a witch hunt of sorts is occuring all over LiveJournal, which, being prompted by Warriors for Innocence (the link is here, but please don't click, there are rumors that the site has a lot of malware and IP address tracking on it), has decided to purge all accounts and communities that are even remotely related to pedophilia, in an attempt to track down potential sexual predators. Because anything I summarize will most likely be incomplete, I direct you to this link over here for further information.

Here now, I will cross-post my opinion from my own LiveJournal. The original entry can be found over here.

So what the hell, all of a sudden there's a witch hunt going on 'round LJ? O_o wtf mate. From what I've just read up on, apparently the targets are fandoms and RP comms that have anything to do with stuff like pedophilia and other sexual subjects prohibited by the United States law and such. I haven't read everything, nor do I quite understand it all, but to my knowledge, the Internet, up until this very minute, is entirely free game, in the sense that it is not bound by the laws of any country. Which makes sense, because even if a website is based in a particular country, all it means is that the people behind the site are of [insert] nationality. This is, of course, simply taking out other variables in which laws may apply in the mix and soley concentrating on the Internet.

However, the main problem here is the fact that the freedom of speech amendment, an American amendment, is being horribly violated here. Blogs are a current trend that are beginning to extend out of the Internet, and subtlely replacing common forms of things like journalism and, well, freedom of speech. To start a witch hunt against people simply because they are interested in [insert sexual fetish], own LJ comms related to it, and have it listed in their interests is a matter of an individual's right to express themselves. In a world that's increasingly becoming smaller and more well-watched (hello Big Brother), the Internet's becoming a safe haven for any and everyone.

Take me for example, I'm an anti-government radical who dislikes capitalism and favors socialism. I'm also in favor of freedom of sexuality, since I myself am slowly realizing and learning that I do not love or like based on gender alone. Take that into the real world and what would happen? I'd get jailed under the Patriot Act and slandered for not being sexually "normal". On the Internet, though, I can express these thoughts freely, and that is exactly what's going under attack, the ability to freely express oneself. And LJ's team is too much of a pussy to fight back against that WFI group making them do this witch hunt. Might the WFI's intentions be good? Sure, what the hell. But they're going about it the wrong way. If they're trying to catch sexual predators and pedophiles and whatnot, the last thing you should be doing is persecuting anyone who just so happens to have it in their interests and participate in comms dealing with it. Why? Because most of them are not pedophiles at all, they just like it in their fandoms and fanfics.

So congratulations, instead of sniffing out the real sexual predators, you've made them go into deeper hiding. Let's hear it for misinformed people, Big Brother and people who refuse to properly inform themselves about the real matters at hand, because they sure as hell are winning the battle. Oh, and let's also congratulate our democratic government, they're doing a fantastic job of limiting and cutting away people's rights to "protect".

I could go on rambling, but I've said my thoughts. Once again, wtf mate.

(And note, as I said, I didn't read up everything, but am quite sure I got the gist of what's going on. If I'm wrong, please inform me.)

To summarize, what're the main problems here?

  • Violation of the primary right to freedom of speech. No, I don't like pedophilia fandoms, or anything of the sort. However, just because someone likes to read fanfictions and discuss oddball pairings does not mean they're potential sexual predators in disguise.
  • LiveJournal has most definitely crossed the line, by letting themselves be bullied by a third party site, without notifying anyone of this ridiculous witch hunt beforehand.
  • Finally, all of this constitutes as a violation of LiveJournal's Terms of Service.

All in all, congratulations Big Brother, you score yet another point.

Friday, May 25, 2007

On moving forward

So. It's been...a month, since I last wrote anything in this blog. I do apologize. I'm not sure if I've got an audience reading this anymore since I don't update this as regularly as I should, but this blog does exist for a reason. That, being to...uh, write and uh...stuff. Boy that was eloquent.

Anyhow, I've been busy. Among other things, I've been taking class, getting wasted, working out, flirting around, watching movies, relaxing, hanging out with my friends, and overall being your average college student/nerd who's also one of the guys. I didn't really intend for it to happen, but during the course of this semester, I've suddenly found myself becoming the "alpha-female" of the group I hang out with, which is usually a bunch of guys. I have female friends too, but I don't hang out with most of them, just a few. I don't really mind though, since I've long considered myself to not really have a mental gender per se. All I have is a sexual preference towards a particular gender, with occasional interest in the other gender. I don't know if this good or bad, since it doesn't really land me any decent dates, but I suppose it could be worse. I at least give it credit for contributing to my creative and out-of-the-box way of thinking.

So, as of now until the end of June, I'm at home on vacation. Much as I like my scholarly and social life, this is a much-needed break I needed. I did manage to do exceedingly well this semester, passing everything expect Estadísticas 1 (which I dropped) with an A. Kickass, if I do say so myself. But I also wanted this time to really sit and think about...well, what else, the one man I've fought tooth and nail to move on from all semester, my lovely ex. It's not to say I wasn't doing anything about this already. I moved back home for physical distance, I cut off contact, I cut my hair short so as to symbolically spit into his belief that women with short hair are dykes, I've hooked up with a few random men to prove to myself that I could be with men without emotional attatchments, I've made new friends, I started working out...the vast majority of what I did, and didn't do, this semester was so I could move the fuck on.

Yet, something was still amiss, despite my efforts. I didn't know what though. To be sure, I held (hold?) a huge grudge against him, and couldn't even think about him without wishing nothing but horrible misery on his existence. But no matter what I did, I just couldn't feel free from him. It was like an invisible chain tied me to him and his memory, the memories I had of him. I suppose it was there for a lot of reasons, but mainly, it was because he was the first guy I could honestly say I loved. Hurrah for true love. But he meant a lot of things to me, and getting over it took more effort than I would've ever liked. I just didn't get myself, really.

So, 'member when I mentioned getting wasted among the activities I mentioned up there? Yeah, so, a couple of weekends ago, to help celebrate the end of the semester, one of the things me and my friends did was buy alcohol and go to one of my friend's apartment and get drunk. Long story short, I did more than 12 shots of 151 rum, along with Smirnoffs and daiquiri and got totally smashed. The reason, though I wouldn't realize it until later, was because I found out that the guy I liked, Gian, had a girl of sorts. They were constantly making out. Much as I liked the girl, I wanted to shove her down some escalators. So I was trying to numb the pain out, go self-destructive tendencies. Anyway, during all that, I called up my ex, and finally said what I'd been dying to tell him for months: that I hate him and his guts and that I wish he'd just do me a favor and die off.

The next day, sobering up and whatnot, I remembered this (and a few other convoluted pieces, because shortly after that, I passed out). And I thought about it a little. I realized that, really, I wasn't actually mad at him anymore, nor did I hold that much of a grudge against him. In fact, all I was hating was the fact that my pride was hurt, and that my feelings were torn to shreds. And I realized, man I'm stupid, this is the invisible chain binding me down? All at once, that chain broke off and I became free as a bird once again, the way I should be. It felt (and still feels) pretty nice.

Since then, I've shaped up a bit. I'm not sleeping with anyone at all, not until I can be sure I'm in a good, actual relationship with a great guy. I'm taking my health seriously, doing all that I can to eat right and keep my blood sugar levels stable. I'm working out harder than ever, and the results are starting to show since I'm shedding the weight I gained this semester from my rampant drinking. And, once again, I feel like I can take on the world and fight anyone and anything till I make it to the top. I think my chances of getting married or being in another relationship are slim to none...but it doesn't matter too much to me at the moment anymore. I'll deal. Life is, after all, no cabaret.

On another note, I saw the third Pirates of the Caribbean movie. Twice. It's that good, I swear it is. I might write a review tomorrow or the day after.

Finally, I believe today is the one year anniversary of this dear blog of mine. I'm still alive and typing. That's always a good sign.