"Writing is like prostitution. First you do it for the love of it, then you do it for a few friends, and finally you do it for the money."
"They say rock and roll is the devil's music. Well, let's say that it is, I got new for you, let's say that rock and roll is the devil's music and we know it for a fact to be absolutely, unequivically true...boy, at least he fucking jams!...If it's a choice between hell and good tunes or eternal heaven and New Kids on the fucking Block, I'm going to be surfing on the lake of fire, rocking out."
Love is a very funny emotion. I read before that being in love is comparable to having a mental disorder of sorts, and it's true. It messes with your brain, it messes with your thoughts, and you tend to do a lot of stupid things that you later regret horribly. As wise as I may sound here, and as laid back as I am, I've been a victim to the horribly sticky web of love, just like any normal person out there. I think the worst that's ever happened to me...huh, which one to pick, I've had loads of bad experiences...well, maybe it was dating someone for six months, thinking that I actually loved him, and then him confessing that he was both gay and transexual a few days after we'd officially been dating for six months. When I look back, I should've stabbed him. I regret that I didn't.
Love in young people is a funny thing. We think that the whole world revolves around ourselves and the people we think we love. We're going to be with that person forever, we're going to get married to them. And the world still revolves around us when we break up. The world has become torrential and catastrophic. And absolutely no one can understand our pain. We're very self-centered like that. I'd like to think that it gets better with age, but that's not really true. With age, we might find someone, we might marry them, but if we're not careful, the love dies. All that's left is the memory of having loved that person. You remember you loved them because your mind tells you so, but your heart just isn't able to grasp that anymore.
Well, it's not like that happens to everyone. I'm not even generalizing; it just happens and it does happen. But that possibility is what worries me most. Sure, right now, all I want is a good time, as should everyone my age want (though most girls my age seem to be looking for their one true love...Jesus, you have your whole lives, don't concentrate on a one true love, there's no such thing). But down the road, five or six years from now, I'd like to get married to someone I love at that moment, and someone I also truely like and care about. Because you can love a person, but you neither have to like or care about them. You don't have to even give a damn if they go out and die in a ditch. I want someone I love, and like and care about, because as I get older, that's what's going to really stick around.
If the marraige ends, so be it. As much as I'd like to believe in fairy tales, there's no such thing as a one true love. And as much as I'd like to just have one true love, I get the feeling that I'll have several during my life, each one as passionate as the last one, and each one ending as painfully as the last. Dunno why God's condemned me to this, but I'll ask when I reach ol' Peter up there. 'Course, I'm also guessing. The guy I'm dating right now (six months, woo) is as likely to be the one I stick with my whole life, and is just as likely to break up with me tomorrow, next week, next year, whenever. That's the beauty of life and love: they're unpredictable, and you'll never know where they'll go next.
Moral of the lecture: if you're young, don't look for love, love comes to you. Just go out and have a good time. With protection. No one wants to have a kid to cart around for eighteen years afterwards if that's not what they wanted.
Watch out there big fella'. Clark Kent might secretly be gay, but he'll still punch your lights out for hitting his pretend wife.